Neurosis, Metal Wilber, and Translation to Potato DEATH!

Neurosis, Metal Wilber, and Translation to Potato DEATH!

Neurosis and Drainland

Last night I found out about a metal show at a place called the Button Factory (an actual nice venue) and decided to attend in order to find out what the metal scene was like over here in Ireland. I was happy to find that a lot of the scene is Doom/Sludge metal, and that the crowd for the headlining band at the show had the place packed wall to wall. The opening band was a group called Drainland, which I dubbed the Irish version of Morbid Angel. Great vocals, awesome set, and I hope to hear more stuff from them. The headliner was Neurosis, a New York band that was originally a hardcore band for their first two albums and then switched to Doom metal (and do a damn good job of putting on a live show). I definitely have to look up both bands when I get back to the states.

One of the best parts of the show was who I ran into. In between the bands sets I ran into these 4 Irish dudes and one of their girlfriends from Belfast that were all simply badass. Another cool fact about these dudes: they are all in metal bands of their own. They were all drunk off their asses and hitting on anything female (and some not) that crossed their paths. They would show their guns (arms for those of you who are special, and not in the “its okay” way), say “this is it!” then ask them if they wanted to marry them.

The elicited responses were priceless, ranging from “fuckin’ bullocks” to lots of giggling to one saying that she could be their mothers, which one of the guys I was with, Richard, gave the best response ever: “FUCK OFF! How old are you?!” To answer all of your questions, yes, the accent does make this sentence acceptable. As I watched the show with these dudes, the one named Ross was cool enough to buy me a Guinness, and they even wanted me to come chill with them at Belfast and see Iron Maiden while I was here.

Were it not for class in the morning, I would have went in a heartbeat, but alas, I had to decline, So I simply asked for their emails to find them on facebook and said goodbye to my new friends. An awesome show and experience for the books.

The metal show came with a price; I woke up with so much back pain I was ready to puke. Luckily I am stubborn and was able to keep food down. After I stopped shaking from pain and nausea and was able to stand up straight, I went down and had breakfast hoping the Ibuprofen would hold out.

Book of Kells

After breakfast, we were going to go to lecture, but Dr. Wilber saw that the book of Kells line was short (and is on display at Trinity college) so we opted to do that instead. The book of Kells is a very old copy of the bible that is illustrated and written about 800 A.D. the display is also accompanied by many other old gospels from various other monks and what not. I would post pictures, but unfortunately they do not allow pictures in the museum, so when I tried to snap a picture a little old Irish man with compensation issues and took his job too seriously told me to erase it. I would have lied and faked it but it seemed the bastard knew how to work my camera….you win this time guard…you win this time.

The most impressive part to me was the old Trinity library. It was like I walked into a scene of an Indiana Jones film! Ancient marble busts lined the book ends with displays in the center, covered in glass displaying many of the beginnings of modern music and medical sciences, namely anatomy. The old library was truly awe-inspiring. We were only allowed to view half of the library for some reason, so I went to ask the guard at the exit why that was, and he simply replied “Well I could tell ya a good bit but the truth is we’re short staffed.” Not the thing I wanted to hear since I do not know if I will ever come back over here, but at least he was honest.

St. Patrick’s Cathedral

After taking a lunch and hitting the milkshake bar (yes, this place DOES exist!) we headed to St. Patrick’s Cathedral, which was quite a long walk. This is where Jonathan Swift is buried and where Catholics pay homage to St. Patrick for earning them the right to practice their religion freely.

The church was full of many old artifacts and was very informative. It was unnerving to see the gift shop in the back of the church when we entered, namely because I used to be a bible quizzer when I went to church and I specifically remember some part of the bible where Jesus storms into the church and starts flipping tables and chairs because you are not supposed to use the church for a place of profit.

Translations (Play)

After that, we all rushed back to our apartments, changed into fancy clothes, and went to a play called Translations about the beginning of the potato famine in Ireland around the beginning of the 1840s. I thoroughly enjoyed the play, and it was well but together, though it ended abruptly and had no real plot resolution, it had tons of metaphorical references from its characters, almost to the point where it was annoyance.

You can't kill the metal...

Today began with a classroom session of Dr. Wilbur and a classroom session, which honestly I would have slept through were it not for my back pain keeping me awake.

After the class session Delaney and I wandered around until our next classroom session at 2 pm, which was actually an assignment for us to do that was assigned during class at the National Museum of Ireland.

National Museum of Ireland

The museum was cool, the exhibits weren’t overwhelming and you can actually finish the museum in one day. The highlights by far were the bog men, bodies that were found in bogs and were perfectly preserved and are now on display there. Ironically enough one was so well preserved that his red hair was still in tact, and looked very similar to Conan O’Brian.

The other highlight was the Viking exhibit, which was rather extensive with Viking weaponry and tools they used in their trades of fishing and weaving. The only exhibit that was pathetic was the Egyptian one they apparently just added. It wasn’t extensive, which I can forgive, but it quite honestly seemed like it was rushed to be added.

After that we went to the GOP (Post office) to see where Michael Collins got shot at during the Easter Rising of 1916 and took a few pictures of where the bullet holes are still present from the machine gun fire. Then we took the light train (a glorified Disney monorail) to the Brazenhead to eat diner, and then walked back to Trinity, where my night got even more awesome.

Bruxelles Basement Bar

This by far has been the most fun I’ve had thus far on this trip (granted my massive back pain hasn’t been a major contributor to the fun factor, either). I got that tip from the guy in the Sound Cellar the other day suggesting Bruxelles to me and said “it’s the only place we still own.” I was dumbfounded when I found the place and saw the outside. It was mostly rich college students and tourists like every other restaurant off of Grafton Street. I saw the stairs off to the side heading to the basement and prepared myself for disappointment, only to not be. I walked into the place, low and behold... metalheads! Just to list a few of the songs that were played on the jukebox while I was still sober enough to write them down:

Arch Enemy – Nemesis

Gary Moore – Over the Hills

Tenacious D – Metal

Motörhead - Stay Out of Jail

Steel Panther – I Want it That Way (yes, it is a Backstreet Boys cover)

Fear Factory – Archetype

And the list goes on. I was so relieved, especially since there were only a handful of people in the bar, so I knew it wasn’t touristy.

Chronicles of Riddick playing on the plasma on the wall while metalheads shooting pool (and they actually shake hands and show good sportsmanship after the game). A properly mixed Jack & Coke properly mixed upon my lips makes this atmosphere even better. Most important of all, the introduction of a brand new favorite drink for me. Apparently these guys had a spare slushie machine just sitting in the back room, and since they are Irish, they decided to put alcohol in it. More importantly, they put my drink in it…that’s right, they had JACK & COKE SLUSHIES!!! I officially entered heaven, my back quit hurting, and it was miraculous.

I also met this badass Irish couple that are metalheads, Aido and Heidi. Heidi is obsessed with Slayer. Aido is obsessed with Amon Amarth. They invited me to drink with them after obliterating any hope of anyone else using the juke box that night (which nice bit of trivia here, apparently that basement bar was the first bar in Dublin to get the digital jukebox, and also this jukebox was amazing, because unlike in American ones, you could literally find almost any song you could think of, including metal artist). Concert experiences were shared, Sláinte was yelled numerous times as we toasted, many fags were smoked, and memories were made with my new friends. The bathroom of this place was also hilarious, because not only did it have the waterfall urinal again, but I could hardly stand up straight in it, and I feel really bad for anyone who had to take a shit in there.

Eventually I had to depart and leave my new friends, but it’s all good, that’s what facebook is for, and why it’s important to always have a writing pad with you.

Tonight I go to see a metal show for a band called Neurosis, and I can’t wait.

~Will

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Old Structures, Churches, and Crosswalks.

I would like to touch on a few things I have noticed here before continuing on with my activities for the day:

1. Crosswalks – when the timers go off, the sound effects they make are similar to that of an old school Galaga machine, and I now have a horrible urge to find an arcade while here and get my game on. The Irish also have the ingenious idea of idiot proof instruction placement on the pavement for all pedestrians to see. This needs to be something America adopts.

2. Their product name brands kick our name brands asses!

3. The birth of Tits or GTFO.

That being said, I am going to have to separate this blog into sections, because I took too many pictures and paid too much attention to the tour guide. Not my normal protocol for going to tourist traps but eh, there was nothing else to do and it kept my mind off my back.

Newgrange

Our first stop was Newgrange, one of the oldest manmade settlements still in existence, predating the pyramids by at least 500 years. To get there we had to drive an hour out of Dublin, so we woke up to take a nap, in essence. We went to the visitors center first, which aside from entertaining myself by finding ornery things I can use to make bad jokes, was nothing really special.

We eventually got to Newgrange after another hour waiting in the visitor center. Unfortunately, they did not allow us to take pictures inside of the building, but we were shown where the light is supposed to be shown through the light box above the entrance door on the winter solstice. In the chamber there was also quite a bit of problems with vandals back in the day, some rather famous. One such is from a priest named T.B. Naylor who defaced the inner chamber Newgrane by carving his name and the year 1894 into the stone. Yes, that’s right; the church vandalized a pagan worship site….oh the irony....

The view around the settlement was breathtaking, so of course we have to exploit it being tourist and all by taking about 20 group photos in the front (courtesy of Dr. Wilbur photography, Ltd.). I also took a short nap on the grass of the hillside at the settlement. Irish grass is amazingly soft and great for just lying on the ground and taking it easy. No wonder most of the Irish like to relax in fields so often.

Monasterboice

Monasterboice is an old abandon monastery no longer in use that only exists now as a graveyard. The only way you can be buried there now is if you happen to have a relative already resting on the grounds. The church has some very tall crosses with very intricate designs. The round tower is still standing where it did 1,000 years ago with its door still pointing towards the most important structure in the monastery at the time, the chapel. These grounds are covered with amazing and elaborate Celtic crosses. If you ever needed inspiration for a cross tattoo design, this is definitely a place to research.

One of the other gimmicks on this trip was to take your boarding time sticker they put on you and place it on a poster at Newgrange. Unfortunately for those who miss that poster, at Monasterboice they found….another place to stick them.

After all of that travel, we drove an hour back to Dublin and since it was my classmate Margaret’s birthday, we all decided to go out with her to celebrate….with booze. We walked all the way from Trinity to Brazenhead (The oldest pub in Ireland) which is a fairly long walk, only to find that they had quit serving food 15 minutes prior to our arrival. We went back to temple bar and ate at a restaurant named Mexico to Rome. They had bacon and egg cheeseburgers which made me very happy, unfortunately, their ability to bartend did not. I got a cocktail called a “Dragon Slayer” which was WAY too weak for the price I paid, and caused fruitiness. I ordered a Jack and Coke next round, only to find out they don’t mix drinks and just hand you a can and glass, basically. While getting massively ripped off by our wait staff, I looked out the window to see my friend Charlie walking by from Lakeland, Florida. I rush outside, tripping over a chair in the process, to catch up with him. The odds are astronomically small when for that to happen, but it did, and it is awesome.

Until next entry!

~Will

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Getting There

So after not really sleeping 3 nights in a row in order to get over here, I think an explanation is in order.

Mom, Dad, my niece Ruby and I all arrived at Tampa international with no problems aside from a piece of sheet metal causing a traffic jam on I-275 and having to detour (bad omen). We flew to Chicago for a 4 hour overlay at O’Hare International Airport, which sadly had no authentic deep dish pizza or hot dog eateries in it, so I left the airport deprived of fulfilling that dream. International flights suck balls. From O’Hare to Dublin was 7 hours, consisting of a shitty Matt Damon movie involving magical fedoras and some other movie with some girl named Selena Gomez in it who is apparently famous (and who hasn’t posted topless pictures of herself online and still works for Disney). Also I apparently leaned forward to sleep against the seat in front of me which irritated an old back injury I sustained and pulled a muscle which has been bothering me all day (bad omen strikes).
We arrived to find that instead of the temperature being 60 degrees it was, in fact, 45 degrees. After being in Florida at 90 degrees and then Chicago at 95 degrees it was welcomed with open arms and felt phenomenal. We were shuttled to Trinity University and checked in and shown our rooms, which sadly enough is nicer than the room I have at home. We were allowed to wander for 4 hours until our guided bus tour, which in that time I walked up and down Grafton Street (similar to Ybor City during the day for you Tampa locals reading this, just a bit more touristy…and green) before returning to get an hour nap. The bus tour was nothing special, aside from it being a double decker bus with an open roof where I made it blatantly obvious to anyone watching that I was intent on raping anything of interest with my camera, homeless people included (I am not picky).
We went our separate ways on Grafton Street and as I was wandering around window shopping when I came across a small hallway that led back into darkness with nothing visible but a giant blue neon Metallica sign. For those of you that know me, you know my distain for the band, but it is a banner that many metalheads follow, so I went down the hallway which led to some stairs. I went down the stairs to find a sign that said Sound Cellar and continued down to find metal posters all over the walls, ceiling, and merchandise everywhere. I was home. Made a few friends, argued over Lemmy’s poor choice in sound technicians and equipment on his last tour, and got some names of bars that actually are metal and a show to go to Monday night, which you have no idea how badass that is!
After that we all walked down to Temple Bar (no, it’s not a bar, it’s an area full of bars) and ate at the Quay Bar & Restaurant located there. I do the most stereotypical thing I can think of while there and order a burger, fries, and a Guinness, which I was happy to find that Guinness actually does taste better over here then in America. My back started to act up bad so I had to leave the restaurant and return to my room early, which I sit here now writing this blog. Not bad for the first day in Ireland, right? I have class tomorrow at 9 so I am ending the blog here and getting my ass to bed.

Autobots…rollout!

~Will

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Guests Check In, They don't Check Out...

Today I read a short story from Frank O’Connor entitled Guest of The Nation. It is a short story about Irish soldiers watching two English soldiers who are prisoners of theirs, but not really. They roam freely about the Inn they are being kept at and all become friends. They are being held because 4 Irish soldiers are being prisoners as well and the English are threatening to shoot them, and if they do, the Irish soldiers are to shoot the prisoners. The English shoot them, and the Irish soldiers have to shoot their English friends, and feel great remorse for having to kill their friends.

My paragraph summary hardly does the story justice. I am actually a huge fan of short stories (some of my favorite being The Book of Sand, The Worlds Most Dangerous Game, and the Cask of Montenegro). This one I think grasps a good point that happens in many wars of a soldier performing his duties and it conflicting with his personal ethics. Doing so can cause catastrophic mental anguish to a soldier (if you have ever talked to many Vietnam veterans, many wont even tell their most horrifying war stories) and leave them scarred for the rest of their lives. This story shows that there is no exception even in regards to the era it occurred in.

Since I already posted my wartime song and don’t want to re-post it, I’ll simply post a classic song involving Irish violence!

T-minus 2 days till Ireland, this should be interesting…

~Will

Commitment to Being Daft...

The Commitments (1991) is about some Irish lads deciding to create a soul band, because they consider themselves the "blacks of Europe, Ireland, and North Dublin." The ironically funny part is they actually become good. Moral of the story: oppression does bring creativity. As they progress with gigs and development of chemistry they get better and better. Naturally as all bands start to take off, strife takes over and someone causes drama.

Overall this was a good movie if you like smartass Irish slang, American soul, and attempting to understand why on earth people in the 90s are willing to pay to see songs written 40 years ago when there are tons of pubs in Dublin with cover bands 4 nights out of the week (which still boggles me).

After my experience last night feeding my family Irish car bombs and being groped by my uncle who thought I was my aunt and my cousin deciding to rest her tit on my head, I thought a Christy Moore of Planxty song involving incest would be properly suited.

My drunchies are hitting now...bullocks, this training for drinking in Ireland is taking its toll on me...

~Will

Drinking + John Wayne acting Irish = weeeeee!!!

John Wayne is always fun to mock the hell out of, especially while drinking, and watching The Quiet Man (1952) is no exception. John Wayne plays an American who came from a small Irish village and is returning to purchase his childhood home. He suffers from love at first site with a red-headed irish woman named Mary Kate, who has a doucebag older brother who doesn't approve of their relationship.

This being one of John Wayne's first movies, his eccentric mannerisms are even more hysterical than in his later films. Portraying the Irish’ true love of booze and fighting to solve problems, which should be mandatory in most cultures. Plus the accents are completely badass and hot on the chick in the film (you thought so too, don't lie). A must watch if you want to understand the culture and the worlds view of it.

Now to leave you with a song that pretty much describes my current state of mind with a lit Salem in hand, a pina colada to the left of my monitor, a can of cheap beer to the right, and a bottle of Jameson and Bailey’s on my back porch waiting for me after I post this:

Grog = amazing!

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